PURPOSE OF LIFE PART V SUCCESS 1

Introduction 

Voluminous material is available at click of a button on this much-talked-about Seven Letter Word. Google flashed 1.3 billion results within seconds and still counting…..Sieving through the maze to access quality literature would be unnerving. Interestingly, almost everyone has an opinion about success but hesitate to discuss specifics!   

However, popular perception is—Money Power Status (MPS) define Success!! While talking  about it recently, my perceptive and affluent young friend commented—

My elderly and tradition-bound uncle firmly believes, Success means, comfortable family life comprising good salary, house, car and so on…. 

Confession of a Billionaire on MPS. Thought-provoking perspective of  Jack Ma, richest man of China "…..My happiest days were when I used to earn 90 yuan ($15) a month,……" 

Life Skills Classes

Session normally started with the question—'What is success?' to challenge the students to think on their feet. My choice to listen, without advice or interruption, was amazingly enriching. To recall few incredible sessions with Class 8/9 students and adults:

Example 1  

 'There are three types of success—what I think is success; what others think is success and what is success' was stated by a Class 8 student!!
Example 2

• Success is a journey not destination
• Success means leading life with no regrets at the end

Example 3 

Majority students of Class 9 said 'Success means achieving one's goal'; Spontaneously the class monitor countered —‘my goal may be to murder someone, but that is not Success". On strength of that logic Wikipedia, would do well to rephrase their definition—"…… Success  can…. mean completing an objective or reaching a goal. ... Colloquial term used to describe a person that has achieved his or her personal, financial or career goals".

Example 3 

 To recall one amazing session with 40 students of Class 9:

Facilitator                              What would be success for you at this stage?

Frontbencher Atul                 90 percent marks. (Approving nod from majority)   

Bakbencher Praful              I don't think 90 percent is success

 Facilitator                             What do you have to say Atul?

Atul                                        वो तो ऐसा ही बोलेगा क्योंकि (he will say that only because) he is a 90 per-center

 

Other students were silent spectators but listening intently.  Curious to explore and draw out more responses, facilitator asked Praful –          What would you consider success? 

He pondered for a while and made a profound statement —

‘I also thought the same earlier. Having attained 90%, I realized marks do not define success. It is something else.  I am not sure what that is but, I think, it has something to do with the soul’……….!! Mega comment had sobering effect on his classmates as they trooped out silently unlike other days!  

Life of Dr Alok Sagar, 69, in fact, symbolizes the perspective of Praful. When he wAs professor at iitd, Former Governor RBI was his student. Resolved to serve the poor, HE quit prestigious and lucrative job AT THE AGE OF 42 to lead a purpose-DRIVEN life amongst villagers.  VIDEO CLIP Of HIS SOUL—SATISFYING MISSION: 

Lesson Learnt: 

Conditioned to follow the crowd, everyone gets busy climbing the 'Success Ladder' without pausing to think whether 'The Ladder' is leaning against the right wall!! Extracts from Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey  

Visualization Exercise 

Session on Success was immensely popular as students enjoyed the interactive format in a non-judgmental and student-friendly environment. Of particular interest was journey into future on Time Machine.^@  This memorable experience students recalled even after years for its uniqueness and emotional impact, stirring deep-seated feelings.   

^@ Ken McRae, my colleague, sensitively scripted the idea drawn from Habit 2, Begin With the End in Mind, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey.   

Journey in Time Machine (TM) 

Preliminaries for Effect 

•             Venue be free from distractions like noise, creaking fans, shouting, honking etc.
•             No body contact between students
•             Eyes be kept shut until told to open. No peeping or whispering
•             Pin drop silence is imperative 

Plot Narrated with Sensitivity by the Facilitator  

This day 01 July 2017 shall remain unforgettable as you will soon experience time warp aboard a uniquely designed TM. You can hear the engine noise already as the TM is approaching to land on school playground. 

          As you walk up, hydraulic doors open extending an escalator to board. Whirling engine noise rises as the awesome machine lifts for vertical takeoff. After hovering for a while, it moves forward both in direction & time—2022, 2030…..Now the year is 2040.  You are saddened to see the appalling change in landscape—concrete jungle had replaced greenery and open space; School campus had shrunk cluttered with high rise buildings. 

TM swerved for landing and descended on open ground.  You see a huge Shamiana and many vehicles parked nearby. Seems special function was on for a VIP. Walking up you were surprised to see known faces of  friends and relatives.  Few classmates were also present. You could also see someone's photograph bedecked with flowers on stage at a distance. You realized all had assembled to attend funeral ceremony.  Walking up the aisle, you see your aged parents, siblings and close relatives sitting quietly and looking sad. You wonder why Mom was wailing and sobbing. When you walk up close to the photographs, you are shocked—it is your funeral ceremony.  Quietly you sit down in a corner.

Compering the event was my most favorite cousin, Rita. She flew long distance from USA to attend. List of speakers included Dad, boss where I worked,   my favourite teacher, a childhood friend and few others.

My old Dad, walked up slowly helped by Rita. Though choked with emotions, he mustered up courage to speak. Listening to him was a welcome revelation. Never knew he had such special feelings for me. Tear welled up when I heard him say—'He was too precious to leave us so suddenly. As for me, this irreplaceable void will be too painful to bear at my age'!!   

Others who followed praised me generously for my values and helpful nature, in particular.   Few shared touching memories of how I had supported them at odd hours. Finally, Rita came up. Blessed with oratory skills and unfailing memory, her narrative, stirred my feelings reliving those moments.  

Looking at the huge gathering moving out, I felt humbled that so many spared time to attend the ceremony. Thinking whether I deserved this honour, I got up and slowly walked back to the TM. 

While returning, time started reversing 2040…2035…2020….2017 when TM landed. 

Facilitator to the students—'We are back to the class room on 01 July 2017. You may now open your eyes'. Having regained focus, they looked around  curious to know the feelings of others. Salient points observed generally:

        1.            Overloaded with emotions, most students were unable to maintain eye contact.

        2.            Few sobbed/cried, mopping their eyes

        3.            Many were silent but in thoughtful mood

        4.            Good number enjoyed the experience

        5         Few looked confused                                                    

Feedback Session

Objective of Life Skills Classes was empowerment of youth enabling them to make value-based choices in life. Aim plus was to influence them to discover Purpose of Life as Life Centre.  To facilitate the objective to sink in logically and internalized individually, the session was structured in question-answer format. 

How Are You Feeling?

Conditioned to live with internal turmoil, students struggled to ventilate feelings. Almost all agreed that the experience was awesome and thought-provoking. They resolved to introspect to deal with cobweb of feelings/self doubt.  

How Would You Like to be Remembered After Death?

'I do not wish to be remembered; neither do I care' is a perspective often shared. In the ensuing discussion, realization dawned—whatever one may think, we leave behind memories of our deeds, good as well as bad!!

28 June 2017  

I was thrilled when Aswin (name changed), 22, contacted me after eight years.  When we met, he was all praise for the quality of interaction with us on different issues then as a confused teenager.  While expressing gratitude, he made one mega confession that the 'Stated Question' had transformational effect on his life and that memory is still fresh 

     

How Would You Know that Your Success Graph is on Track?

As for me such ecstatic moments as that of Ashwin's visit are strong indicators. My success graph is studded with many such instances since 2000, when I discovered my Purpose of Life. More later……  

Conclusion

To reiterate, unless the ladder of success is leaning against the Right Wall, one would remain under delusion of leading a Successful Life. To discover the Right Wall, one needs to be clear and convinced of answers to the following questions:    

1)             Between Being & Doing Which One is More Important and Why?

2)             What are the Two Most Crucial Things in Life Other Than God & Primary Needs? 

3)             Am I a Product of Choices or Environment? 

4)             What should be My Life Centre?

Hint

Money, Power and Status are of almost no relevance while processing answers to the four fundamental questions!!!  

To Be Contd